Life On The World Of The Cross

Um, yeah. . . Please don’t ask us how McCain manages to hold himself upright for these several dozen examples of a humanoid without a backbone. We have no frakkin’ idea.

                    

Photo of McSame’s Botched Nip/Tuck & Hormone Treatment Said to Resemble Trash Media’s Bat Boy

ABOARD THE DOUBLE TALK EXPRESS  (C.U. News) — In an effort to close the perceived and actual age gap between himself and his much younger rival for the presidency, presumptive Republican candidate John McSame has apparently taken the advice of his surgically and chemically-enhanced wife to do some enhancement of his own appearance.

But in this photo, allegedly leaked by a horrified member of McCain’s inner circle and sold at a handsome profit to Weakly Whurled NEWS, the operation and hormone treatments have gone terribly wrong. Luckily for his campaign, a full head and face mold was taken before the alterations, and a latex mask fabricated that preserved his prior appearance.

“It’s a temporary fix,” explained a campaign aide, who insisted on anonymity. “We’re worried that as the heat of summer increases, the mask will start to sag and deteriorate. We’re also worried about how it will hold up indoors under the klieg lights during the debates.”

McSame, who’s on record saying that he’s a twentieth century kind of guy, is wrestling with whether to ascribe his 64+ changes in position to shameless pandering, poor flip flopping impulse control, the after effects of five years of torture as a POW in Vietnam— anything but symptoms of advancing senility.

“If we can just push John Sidney over the finish line in November, we’ll be in the clear. After that, we’ll have all the power of the White House at our disposal. Look how well Reagan’s people disguised his Alzheimer’s during his second term,” said the aide hopefully.

Asked whether voters deserved to know the truth about McSame’s current condition, he replied:

“Look, the American people have experienced enough traumas during eight years of the Dick-Bush Administration. Iraq, Afghanistan, 9/11, the tanking economy, the extreme weather effects of global warming— they can only take so much.

“There’s just some change not worth believing in.”

                    

From John Tomasic.

Asked for comment on the media attention Obama was drawing for his trip, McCain simply said “It is what it is.”

But [Elizabeth] Bumiller writes that she got a less-resigned reaction from McCain’s entourage.

McCain’s comments were mild compared with the bleak mood and frustration on the part of his advisers, who have taken to referring to Obama sarcastically as “The One” and railing against the large amount of coverage Obama is receiving compared with McCain.
“There is nothing you can do about it,” said an acerbic Mark Salter, one of McCain’s closest advisers, while standing at the back of a modest crowd assembled to hear McCain speak at a picnic in South Portland, Maine. ” ‘The One’ went to Europe, and homage must be paid.”

ROTFLMFAO. I wonder who they have to blame for that. Obama? Certainly. McCain? Absolutely. He’s the useful tool that paid for the ad above. Even McCain’s toadies know Obama is “The One.” So who ya gonna call??

“The One” with First Lady Michelle, and Vice-President Gort

                    

THE NEW JIHADIST magazine; not available just anywhere.

Americans are largely unaware of the Muslim culture, except what they might glean from long time practitioners like Sean Hannity or Rush Limbaugh, and other reliable MSM shills who see into the soul of religion, and can safely label all Muslims as the sworn enemies of the Christian God and all Americans.

Imagine then, my surprise at finding a copy of the August issue of THE NEW JIHADIST at my neighborhood Christian bookstore, not entirely unknown for a selection covering all of the “false” religions, cults, and isms in the world. The rotund little blossom of Christian love behind the cash register was sweet, and said they had been carrying THE NEW JIHADIST ever since John Hussein Bigboote, a recent immigrant from India, took over the managerial duties at the store.

The exclusive interview with Senator Barack Obama, with a photochop cover that depicts Barack in a loose turban and robe, wearing a honkin’ big crucifix, was intended to excite the Great Satan and leftist American dogs whose own leaders recently recognized them as a nation of whiney mental cases. Anyway. Their unedited interview with Barack Hussien Obama, if it is real, appears to be one of the most profoundly hopeful glimpses into the mind of the man many hope will be the next president of the United States.

(NOTE: Senator Obama met with reporters from THE NEW JIHADIST magazine in Jerusalem; the interviewer was only identified as “TNJ,” but Obama remarks that five other people were present at the interview.)

TNJ: We appreciate you talking with us Mr. Obama; we are not enemy but we are actually surprised you talk with us, as you would negotiate with enemies; thank you for this courtesy.

BHO: Thank you for having me.

TNJ: Are you a Muslim?

BHO: No.

TNJ: Are you Sunni Muslim?

BHO: No.

TNJ: Maybe you are Shiite Muslim?

BHO: No. (Chuckles)

TNJ: Maybe you are new secret kind of Muslim?

BHO: No.

TNJ: You are certain of this?

BHO: Yes, of course; as certain as I am that I’m sitting here with the five of you, now.

TNJ: But the Americans seem very nervous you are secret Muslim. That you are Muslim as child, and are Muslim now. Is this true?

BHO: No.

TNJ: American people seem very nervous you are going to make Jihad on them from the White House. Will you do this?

BHO: Of course not. However, I do intend to wage a single-minded campaign upon the sworn enemies of the United States, as one of the means at my disposal in bringing peace back to our country, and to the world. The United States of America is not a war-loving country, despite the state of war which currently exists between us and two other nations, Iraq, and Afghanistan. I intend to bring the war in Iraq to a close in a year and a half; if unforeseen events might dictate that it should take longer, it will remain my imperative to overcome any obstacle to that goal as quickly as we can effectively do so.

And going forward it is my hope and sincere wish to assist the Iraqi government and its people as much— or as little— as they might prefer. America is a sovereign nation, and my administration will recognize and treat Iraq, and all other nations on this planet, with the very same respect we ourselves as a sovereign people wish for ourselves. And these same terms will apply in particular to our enemies.

TNJ: Sorry? Do you apply this respect to enemies for the Jihad against your nation?

BHO: In a manner of speaking, yes. Jesus Christ said, “Love your enemies.” And while my faith informs me that he meant that in the spiritual sense, it is not lost on me that he also taught that all men are brothers. We are all the children of a Divine Creator. He said that in the fellowship of his kingdom there shall be neither Jew nor gentile, rich nor poor, free nor bond, man nor woman. In our Scriptures it says that “In Christ shall all the families of the earth be blessed; that he will hear the cry of the needy and save the souls of the poor who seek him; that all nations shall call him blessed.” I believe this is true.

So; when I try to understand how Jesus, the Son of God might view the problems I face as a candidate and will face as president of the United States, you know, “What would Jesus do”— I see that our nation has strayed from the highest traditions of it’s Judeo-Christian roots. The ideal of loving one another is clear enough among the members of our American families; so our challenge as religionists, and as Americans, is to expand that familial love out to larger and larger groups of the family of man.

You know, the great symbol of the United States is an eagle who carries the arrows of destruction in one claw, and the olive branch of peace in the other; this is the way we will respect all men, in all nations. We can live together in peace, or we can fight; we will prefer to wage peace.

TNJ: You are Christian then?

BHO: Yes; my faith in God and his Son Jesus are the core of my belief system, and I hope to practice it with as many different religionists in the course of my duties as president, and as a man among men and women.

TNJ: But American Christians do not believe this is true. They say you are secret Muslim.

BHO: That perception is held by some who insist they can know me better than I know myself. But one of the things I love most about my country is we have the freedom to believe any way we like; so, I will continue to work in a manner that will quite naturally show the truth of my commitment to both God, and my country; and on behalf of our nation I will recommit to sharing those values with our all neighbors; the same values that America was founded upon, and which continue to make our country what the American people, in their noblest heart, want it to be.

TNJ: And what is that? You say to your voters, “Together we can change the world!” What is the meaning of this?

BHO: I mean a world that lives in peace, and works for mutual prosperity and cooperation; a world that is a good steward of the environment, the air, water, and natural resources that we must all depend on; a world where our highest morals and values and mutual affection for one another dictate our path and guide our planet.

TNJ: You are idealist; Idealistic? How can this be practical when many suffer at the hands of your nation?

BHO: I am an idealist, but my idealism must always be tempered by the world we live in. I am not a blind and unreasoning optimist; but I do have real confidence in mankind, that we are fully capable to recognize it is to our mutual benefit to find peaceful solutions to our problems.

Now, I understand that, perhaps you yourselves, and the people who read your magazine, are waging a holy war, a “Jihad,” against our people. That requires that our nation answer the threats against us, and we will continue to do so. But we would much rather be exploring our— yours and mine— mutually shared values, than wasting our time, youth, and treasure killing each other. That is the true “victory” the real outcome we seek in Iraq. It is my hope that we may someday soon explore the full extent of our grievances with each other, and through civil and respectful discourse, find peaceful and beneficial solutions to all of them.

TNJ: You are positive person, Mr. Obama; but you are racing for president against John Sidney McCain, who jokes about killing our Iranian brothers by cigarettes! How can this man become top leader?

BHO: Well, he hasn’t, at least not yet; I’m still working as hard as I can to see that honor and responsibility will fall to me.  John McCain says I would rather lose a war so that I might win an election, and that he would rather lose an election and win a war.  To me this is a false choice; If and when I win this election it will be because the majority of the American people would rather bring a responsible end to an unnecessary war, than continue hemorrhaging  the lives of our military and our nation’s treasury, and they know that John McCain will do neither.

TNJ: And Bush! What can the world think of such a person! How can such people be elected by your people to carry out Jihad on Muslim nations!? Christian Bush says Christian God tell him to bring Armageddon to us!

BHO: There is much discussion and disagreement in my country on the Bush administration’s policies and their particular religious viewpoint. I intend real change for our nation, and there has been a great reception by the American people to our message of hope and change, and an end to the ways of war; I have asked our people to believe in my ability to bring real change, but also to believe in their own ability to do the same.

TNJ: You are touring the Middle Eastern area. American press say you are gathering facts and “fortifying your credentials as commander-in-chief.” Is this what you do here?

BHO: It’s true, I haven’t had too many jobs with a commander-in-chief component. But as America’s next president, I want to see firsthand and hear from our young soldiers; they are why I’m here.

TNJ: You are brown man— black and white; how does this qualify you to lead your country?

BHO: My religion has probably done more to teach me about all kinds of people than anything else, but my racial heritage has allowed me to look at not only whites and blacks particularly, but all races, with a renewed sense of respect. After a time I realized correctly I think, that God made us different to make loving one another a serious undertaking; to build our characters in ways that, if we were all one race, would not call forth those experiences that cause real growth and understanding between nations and their peoples.

TNJ: You are supporter of Israel; how can you be fair to plight of Palestinian people?

BHO: Israel is an important friend and ally of ours; they are an important democratic nation in a troubled and strategic region. My first responsibility is of course to the American people, and the security of our nation. But even the most powerful nations of the world can ill afford to ignore the needs of even the weakest nations; we must find the ways to ensure we live together in peace. Therefore in an international sense I am as committed to the safety of all human beings, as I am committed to the safety and well being of the Palestinian people, and will work to find equitable and fair solutions to the problems that confront both the Palestinians and the Israeli people.

When we talked earlier about changing the world, I was reminded that three of the world’s greatest religions look to Jerusalem as the nexus of their collective faith; so much history involves here. This is a part of the world that should be recognized as the primary historical center of our collective recognition of the Divine Creator; a place that should eschew all violence; especially violence perpetrated in God’s name. It’s time we honored the religious heritage of our world by at the very least, respecting the one city that has been host to so much of our religious history.

TNJ: We must end interview; we must go. We thank you for your time with us, we will be watching for your success in America.

BHO: Very well. I thank you all for your time as well. May we both find our way to peace in our time.

                    

McSame demonstrates he no longer needs his wife to access the internets

Frank Rich begins his New York Times Sunday column yesterday by noting what a favor Barack Obama did for his presidential rival, John McSame, by traveling overseas this weekend:

THE best thing to happen to John McCain was for the three network anchors to leave him in the dust this week while they chase Barack Obama on his global Lollapalooza tour. Were voters forced to actually focus on Mr. McCain’s response to our spiraling economic crisis at home, the prospect of his ascension to the Oval Office could set off a panic that would make the IndyMac Bank bust in Pasadena look as merry as the Rose Bowl.

Or at least Pasadena’s annual Dooh Dah Parade. With the Rethuglicans‘ economic legacy in mind, I’m expecting a gaggle of gay guys to compete in a yanked-from-the-wall, ATM drag race down Colorado Blvd. But I digress.

Frank continues:

In 2000, he told an interviewer that he would make up for his lack of attention to “those issues.” As he entered the 2008 campaign, Mr. McCain was still saying the same, vowing to read “Greenspan’s book” as a tutorial.

Consulting former Fed Chairman Alan Greenspan for advice on the economy is like reading a book on military tactics by General George Custer. Greenspan as much as anyone is responsible for the present economic catastrophe, which promises to be the most severe economic recession since the Great Depression.

Last weekend, the resolutely analog candidate told The New York Times he is at last starting to learn how “to get online myself.” Perhaps he’ll retire his abacus by Election Day.

[See image and caption above.]

Mr. McCain’s fiscal ineptitude has received so little scrutiny in some press quarters that his chief economic adviser, the former Senator Phil Gramm of Texas, got a free pass until the moment he self-immolated on video by whining about “a nation of whiners.”

Only a couple of weeks have passed since The Wall Street Journal speculated that Gramm would be McSame’s Treasury Secretary (should the Rethuglicans hit the electoral trifecta and steal yet another presidential election).

Gramm certainly has the support of McSame’s best boy, South Carolina Sen. Lindsey Graham. Lindsey once called Phil: “A legend in terms of fiscal discipline.” A legend also known for engineering the Enron Loophole that has enabled unregulated hedge funds to help rocket energy prices into the stratosfear. And who as vice chairman of the UBS investment bank helped usher in the era of sub-prime mortgage loans, collateral damage evident in the collapse of Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac and the whole Bush-damned housing market.

[Meanwhile, Phil seems to have taken a page from Rudi Guiliani’s book. He was last seen dressed as a platter toting Marie Antoinette haranguing people in line at the Austin unemployment office: “Ya’ll want some nice soft, squishy brie to go with that whiiine?”]

Frank proceeds to point out McSame’s multiple-economic flip flops on everything from tax cuts for the rich, to social security reform, mortgage bailouts, and off-shore oil drilling. The latter is supposed to lower gas prices a couple of pennies a gallon before the sun goes nova.

Then there are the self-defeating pander plays like his summer gas tax “holiday” that would in many communities suspend road maintenance, costing consumers more at the repair shop than they would save at the pump. Senator Pothole is probably unaware that the $40 billion federal highway trust fund already expects a $3.2 billion deficit next this year as a result of people driving less and using more fuel efficient cars. Senator Patty Murray (D-WA), head of the Senate transportation appropriations subcommittee, says that we are now less than a year from total bankruptcy!

And in a perfect fusion of flip flopping pandering, McSame promised in February of this year to balance the budget by the end of his first term, then in April said he’d do it by the end of his second term, and then just this month went back to predicting economic nirvana by his first term. No wonders his intended base is suffering from cognitive whiplash.

Rich puts the capstone atop McSame’s pyramid of absurdities by pointing out what has to be a record– a mere 24 hour interval between him saying that “great economic progress” has been made under Bush to saying that “Americans are not better off than they were eight years ago.”

The only way to make sense of McSame’s economic policies is to follow the advice he himself gave when asked how he would go about choosing a vice president:

Well, basically, it’s a Google.

[Image credit to Marc Luscher @luscher.org]

                    

Finding the Invisible

WE HAVE TALKED about the startle of everyday life, how it is not the reality, but the dream life that you see. For when you are plunged into the sea of sensuous existence, your true life leaves you like smoke. It evaporates into the stuff of dreams, it is hard to hold yourself to yourself.

Your past experiences are past indeed; those strains and emotions of sensuous life are gone and what has remained is the temple of your own building, that edifice not built by hands. The reality of you is in the invisible; the intangible. In retrospect your spiritual milestones stand stronger to you in their fixed position than any outward experience.

Having arrived at this understanding try now, quietly, gently, without too much effort of self-discipline, to keep in the invisible; train yourself to keep immaterial. Watching and praying are essential. When hard pressed by old habits and the pressures of time and events, you, as it were, disappear. This is the moment to step back into the invisible, for then the invisible will enfold you and give you great power in the visible world.

Acquire new habits; I cannot tell you how, I can only try to awaken your desire. If your desire is to be in the presence of the Infinite Omniscient Spirit, it must mean that you lay down your sensuous material life that you may find strength and happiness, beauty and knowledge, by being in holy communion with the Spirit within you.

Do not misunderstand me in this; play is good, is necessary, and normal; pleasures are important; the question is— What does your mind feed upon? What is your scale of values? To meet the Spirit within, which is invisible to human life, you must acquire a quality and a technique in dwelling in the invisible while in the visible.

You know— you sense— as does the race in spite of its trial and error existence, that there are forces far beyond our understanding. As you become stronger in the realization of this immortality within you, the clearer will the way be revealed to you. . . how to keep yourself dissolved and refined in the betraying, impinging, benumbing, outer visible world that you may find yourself strong and serene while living in the flesh.

See your true self as a high mountain, calm and lofty, still and eternal. The daily task— the mean, the malicious, the challenging, the seeming meaninglessness of this little measured existence— see through them all while you are in them, to the lofty pinnacle of your inner self. Nothing here has scale; it is limitless, infinite, transcendent.

Now that you know, now that you begin to realize your godhood, your Divine eternal gift, take the measures necessary to keep invisible in a visible world, immortal in a mortal world; eternal in a changing world; continually reborn in a dying world.

Restated from Letters of the Scattered Brotherhood • 1948

• • •

The hope of a better nation— a better world—
is bound up in the progress and enlightenment of the individual.

• • •

                    

A Charge To Keep, by W.H.D. Koerner

The above painting was proudly displayed in Governor George Bush’s office in Austin, Texas. As Crooks and Liars describes it:

In 1995, he issued a memo to his Texas staff, describing the painting, by W.H.D. Koerner in 1916, which he kept on his office wall. Bush told his aides:

The…painting is based upon the Charles Wesley hymn “A Charge to Keep I Have.” I am particularly impressed by the second verse of this hymn. The second verse goes like this: “To serve the present age, my calling to fulfill; O may it all my powers engage to do my Master’s will.”

This is our mission. This verse captures our spirit. […]

When you come into my office, please take a look at the beautiful painting of a horseman determinedly charging up what appears to be a steep and rough trail. This is us. What adds complete life to the painting for me is the message of Charles Wesley that we serve One greater than ourselves.

When one looks at the painting, you see a man on horseback — who actually looks a little like Bush — apparently leading a group of missionaries. It worked for Bush on a couple of levels: the title comes from one of the president’s favorite Methodist hymns, the man in the picture looks like him, and he related to the missionary work depicted in the painting.

He liked all of this so much, Bush used the title for his autobiography (which he admittedly did not write). He even brought the picture with him to Washington upon taking office.

The funny part is the truth about the painting: “Bush’s inspiring, proselytizing Methodist is in fact a silver-tongued horse thief fleeing from a lynch mob.”

Hard to think of a better metaphor for Thursday’s announcement that Bush has set forth an “aspirational goal,” part of “a general time horizon” for withdrawing US forces from Iraq. An event that John McSame likes to call “surrender.”

Not only did Bush pull the rug from beneath McSame’s feet, but Iraqi Prime Minister Nuri al-Maliki proceeded to roll him up inside it by telling the German magazine Der Spiegel that Obama’s plan for withdrawal of US troops for Iraq is just hunky dory with him:

“US presidential candidate Barack Obama talks about 16 months. That, we think, would be the right timeframe for a withdrawal, with the possibility of slight changes.”

Oh dear, how cold it must be for Saint John to be dangling there alone, twisting slowly, slowly in the wind…

                    

Phil Gramm slinks off into the Time Horizon

Phil Gramm, a once overly proud and supposedly well-educated Republican who succumbed to the corruption of the evil influence of power and politics, was sent down the McCain Mountain of Straight Talk Slag late Friday night, slinking off into the violent storm brewing on the “time horizon.”

A “time horizon” is a supposedly fixed point in the future at which processes are assumed to end. A “timetable” on the other hand, provides a time in the future at which processes are assumed to take place. This distinction is lost on a “Nation of Whiners,” as Gramm pointed out in a recently published magazine interview.

John McCain, who has been reaping the wisdom of Gramm as his chief economic adviser, said in February, “There is no one in America that is more respected on the issue of economics than Senator Phil Gramm.” However, a McCain campaign official said the Republican presidential candidate does not share Gramm’s views. Go figure.

Gramm will be scurrying back to his number two position at USB in Switzerland, where it is thought he will continue to elaborate on the negative effects of the “mental recession” that is gripping the United States, and has so many whiners acting out over their psychological financial health.

Obama campaign spokesman Hari Sevugan responded:

“The question for John McCain isn’t whether Phil Gramm will continue as chairman of his campaign, but whether he will continue to keep the economic plan that Gramm authored and that represents a continuation of the polices that have failed American families for the last eight years.”

Senator McCain has not yet announced a timetable for announcing a new source for economic advice, but one may safely assume the new adviser is out there somewhere on the time horizon, furiously planning how we can obfuscate the nation out of the deepening mental recession.

                    

“A Head of Our Times” —Terry Kruger

Yesterday, Barack Obama appeared with Indiana Senator (and veep prospect) Birch Bayh at a forum at Purdue University where he continued to articulate his national security vision. As The Indiana Star reported it:

… Obama argued that the Bush administration has not stayed “one step ahead of the threats of the 21st century.”

Naturally, this line caught my attention as it reflects the second line in my “About” Bio here at US:

“My first editorial column (mid ’70s) was called ‘Staying One Step Ahead of the Future,’ a mantram which I try to follow to this day.”

I’m by no means a big Bible reader, but I was probably influenced by the line in Proverbs 29:18 (perhaps Barack was too):

Where there is no vision, the people perish. . .

Not that vision, or at least the claim to one, is always a good thing. As Bob Woodward writes in “Bush at War”:

[T]he president was casting his mission and that of the country in the grand vision of God’s master plan.

This is the same Bush who told Palestinian President Mahmoud Abbas that God had told him to strike down Saddam. And we all know how that turned out. So in discussing vision in a political context it is imperative to distinguish between process and content, between means and ends. George Bush Senior admitted he wasn’t particularly good at “the vision thing,” but at least he had enough foresight not to invade Iraq when he had the opportunity.

As for oedipally challenged Junior, he too was likely influenced by the Proverb, but decided that the phrase immediately following “the people perish— ” “but he that keepeth the law, happy is he” wasn’t to his liking.

Launching a preventive war, which the Nuremberg Tribunal designated as the supreme war crime, violated the very international laws that the US did so much to champion in the ruinous wake of World War II.

As for a ‘vision’ of what awaits George and his cohorts after they leave office, I refer the reader to former prosecutor Vincent Bugliosi’s new book The Prosecution of George W. Bush for Murder.” And this quote from H.G. Wells:

A time will come when a politician who has willfully made war and promoted international dissension will be. . . surer of the noose than a private homicide.

                    

Findings of the US Climate Change Science Program

While the vast amount of media coverage of Obama’s speech on national security today will focus on Iraq and Afghanistan, I would note what Obama himself says is the greatest single security threat to the US (and the world):

This immediate danger is eclipsed only by the long-term threat from climate change, which will lead to devastating weather patterns, terrible storms, drought, and famine. That means people competing for food and water in the next fifty years in the very places that have known horrific violence in the last fifty: Africa, the Middle East, and South Asia. Most disastrously, that could mean destructive storms on our shores, and the disappearance of our coastline.

This is not just an economic issue or an environmental concern - this is a national security crisis. For the sake of our security - and for every American family that is paying the price at the pump - we must end this dependence on foreign oil. And as President, that’s exactly what I’ll do. Small steps and political gimmickry just won’t do. I’ll invest $150 billion over the next ten years to put America on the path to true energy security. This fund will fast track investments in a new green energy business sector that will end our addiction to oil and create up to 5 million jobs over the next two decades, and help secure the future of our country and our planet. We’ll invest in research and development of every form of alternative energy - solar, wind, and biofuels, as well as technologies that can make coal clean and nuclear power safe. And from the moment I take office, I will let it be known that the United States of America is ready to lead again.

Never again will we sit on the sidelines, or stand in the way of global action to tackle this global challenge.

Over four years ago, the Guardian leaked an internal report, ordered by THE senior Pentagon official, Andrew Marshall, aka “Yoda,” that made this very point. Money quote:

The document predicts that abrupt climate change could bring the planet to the edge of anarchy as countries develop a nuclear threat to defend and secure dwindling food, water and energy supplies. The threat to global stability vastly eclipses that of terrorism, say the few experts privy to its contents.

Better late than never, I suppose….