Palin’s New Book

Pailn

Here at US we just received an advanced copy of the cover of Sarah Baracuda‘s highly anticipated first work of historical fiction biography, Going Rogue, and we thought we’d share it with you.

Until the actual text becomes available,  we can only analyze the text on the cover itself. We found the main title, Going Rogue, confusing. “Going” is the equivalent of becoming, as in becoming or going crazy. Thus, the title confers that Sarah has chosen to become a rogue, to act roguishly. The subtitle  “An American Life” is probably meant to imply that all Americans are rogues, and by gosh, she’s just your average American roguish gal. (Whatever happened to maverick?)

So, what’s a rogue? Here’s the definition provided by the online version of the Merriam Webster Dictionary:

Main Entry: 1rogue
Pronunciation: \ˈrōg\
Function: noun
Etymology: origin unknown
Date: 1561

1 : vagrant, tramp
2 : a dishonest or worthless person : scoundrel
3 : a mischievous person : scamp
4 : a horse inclined to shirk or misbehave
5 : an individual exhibiting a chance and usually inferior biological variation

Why would Sarah self-identify with (1) vagrants and tramps, with (2) dishonest and worthless scoundrels, with (3) mischievous scamps? Is this a public confessional required by her religious beliefs to admit her sins and shortcomings?

Less likely, (4) she considers herself a misbehaving animal; or (5) an individual with an inferior genetic makeup. But in the interest of fairness, let’s consider all five possibilities.

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1 : vagrant, tramp

As in going tramp? Hmm, we might not need go any further than that, given that a tramp is defined as someone who continually changes abodes or occupations (or a woman of loose morals, specifically a prostitute, but we won’t go there.) We’ve already noted here at US her many mid-stream career changes, from her aborted term as mayor of Wasilla, which she quit to serve on a state energy advisory board, which she quit to run for governor, which she quit in her first term to become…an author! Circle complete.

2 : a dishonest or worthless person : scoundrel

As in becoming a dishonest, worthless scoundrel.  While its a matter of record that she abused her power as governor trying to get her former brother-in-law state trooper fired, and that she was busted for filing bogus per diem claims  charged to Alaska taxpayers for living in her own home (and did she ever return those $150,000 worth of clothes provided to her during the presidential campaign?) , there may be other “huge” secrets waiting in the wings as the father of her grandchild, Levi Johnston, indicated yesterday on the CBS Morning Show.

3 : a mischievous person :scamp.

Well, she’s certainly creating mischief in the special election in  New York‘s 23rd district, supporting conservative third party candidate Doug Hoffman over the designated Republican in the race, which could very well split the vote and put the Democratic candidate in office. We would note that, as a verb, scamp means: to perform hastily and carelessly, qualities of action she has demonstrated throughout her public career.

4 : a horse inclined to shirk or misbehave.

We won’t insult our fellow creatures, noted for their intelligence and loyalty, by associating them with a woman who relishes killing animals and displays their stuffed carcasses in her office and home. It might not always be obvious, but we have standards here.

5 : an individual exhibiting a chance and usually inferior biological variation.

Whether Sarah’s wingnuttery is a genetically inherited condition, a cognitive disorder, or an acquired taste remains a mystery, though the interviews she gives on her upcoming book tours should prove instructive.

Meanwhile, a new poll from CNN shows that 71% of American find her unqualified to be president. If nothing else, Sarah will continue to provide valuable data for anthropologists, sociologists, psychologists, political scientists, and of course, comedians and satirists everywhere.

5 Comments

  1. Propagandee Propagandee

    Thanks HOD:

    As an animal lover, I’ve always been fond of this passage from The Urantia Book:

    The adjutant mind-spirits experientially grow, but they never become personal. They evolve in function, and the function of the first five in the animal orders is to a certain extent essential to the function of all seven as human intellect. This animal relationship makes the adjutants more practically effective as human mind; hence animals are to a certain extent indispensable to man’s intellectual as well as to his physical evolution.

  2. Michael Hart

    I’m waiting for when her book gets out up there in the great white nothing but numb-nuts land and Levi’s buddies rag him mercilessly until he retaliates with something “huge,” just to prove who’s really lying through their million point twenty-five dollar advance. It’s going to make thanksgiving at the Palin residence a seriously nasty food fight.

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