Super Bowl 50 Not So Super for Jeb!

During Super Bowl 50, when Bernie Sanders was the Denver Bronco defense and Jeb! Bush was the Carolina Panthers offense, somebody thought it was a good idea to spend $5 million to run a commercial for Jeb!, featuring his village idiot brother.

Behavioral Economics: The Big Short Part III, The DK Effect Part VI

Tune into any of the three major business news channels and you’ll be treated to an endless parade of “experts” framing that day or week’s trading activities with narratives that, on the surface, seem to explain what’s driving the market at any given time. But after a couple of decades of watching these people, I’ve concluded that a great deal of their “analysis” is simply designed to keep the rubes in the game by providing seemingly “rational” explanations for what are largely high frequency, computer driven trading schemes that use “dark pools” of money and others forms of subterfuge to separate investors from their money.

TrumPenstein Redux (Updated)

But now that the Trumpestein monster has broken his restraints and left the table, marauding across the countryside and terrorizing the peasants (cue music: The Monster Mash…it caught on in a flash.), the GOP is forced to reanimate the issue.

Lifeboat Ethics For Compassionate Conservatives?

There are no Compassionate Conservatives in lifeboats… or anywhere else. Confronted with the ethics of other in a lifeboat of their own making, five “leaders” tell it like it is. . . In Alfred Hitchcock’s classic 1944 film, Lifeboat, a few British and U.S. civilians, a German combatant, and a couple merchant marines are stuck in a lifeboat* together after their ship …

JEB! vs. MAR!

Empty wheelchair on cliff edge, desert

Has anyone seen Poppy Bush since this week’s GOP debate and Jeb!’s campaign firings?

A paralegal for a Huston attorney reports that during a visit to the Harris County courthouse Thursday, she noticed a file lying on the counter, tagged with the name of George H.W. Bush. The paralegal, who wishes to remain anonymous, admitted she was consumed with curiosity and opened the folder. Inside was a codicil to the will of Bush the Elder. In a nutshell, the amendment stipulated that the part of his estate, previously assigned to his second son John Ellis Bush (aka JEB!), would be immediately transferred to one Marco Antonio Rubio. (aka MAR!): Jeb! vs Mar! begins!

A spokesman for Bush the Elder refused to comment. But a reporter assigned to the Rubio campaign was able to corner him in the not-so-secret passageways that run under the Capitol Building, trying to duck yet another Senate vote.

“Senator Rubio! There are numerous reports in the press that major donors to the Bush campaign are leaving him in droves and are flocking to your campaign. This apparently includes his own family,”she exclaimed, dramatically thrusting a copy of 41’s codicil into his face. “Surely you’ve seen this by now. Care to comment?”

Rubio, pulling a large yellow sponge from his coat pocket and pressing it feverishly to his forehead, managed to compose himself. After sucking down large gulps of Fiji Water supplied to him by an attentive aide, he replied:

“You know, it’s a hard day’s night when your former mentor turns on you like Master Jeb! turned on me after Wednesday night’s debate. But I understand that as the GOP’s former front runner and heir apparent to the Bush family political dynasty, he is freaking out. Nonetheless, I feel hurt. It would be like Mr. Miyagi suddenly turning on Daniel San and hitting him over the head with a saki bottle.”

At which point two of his larger aides grabbed him under his dampened armpits and escorted him out of the hallway. Ewe.

Saki to me.

Oh Yeah? Hug This.

Sometimes I just want someone to hug me and say, “Things are going to be okay. Here’s a coffee. And five million dollars.”