Sarah Palin’s Resignation

palin-moose1Sarah Palin riding her dinner home

When I lived in Alaska, I lived in a suburban Anchorage neighborhood where there were no fences and the dogs were allowed to roam free ’til their meal tickets returned home from work. Mine, a 90 lb Rotweiller-Weimaraner mix, was no exception.

The winter of ’92 was particularly bad. Snow piled so high on my driveway that I couldn’t toss it high enough on either side to prevent it from falling back down on my head. Even the moose were starving, abandoning their natural hillside habitats for the burbs in a desperate search for food.

One day my loyal doggie returned home reeking of some god-awful stench. Nothing like coming home after a hard day’s work and having to wash the dog. This repulsive routine continued for days. Consulting my neighbors, they had the same complaint.

One fine night (in winter the sun sets in Anchorage in mid to late afternoon) el doggo trotted proudly up the stairway with what looked like a tree limb in her mouth. Dropping it on the landing with a loud, heavy KERTHUNK, she looked at me expectantly for approval. Closer inspection revealed it was the foreleg of a moose.

Finally, it was discovered that someone in an adjacent neighborhood had lured one of those starving freight train sized beasts into his garage with a head of lettuce. Closing the door behind it, he proceeded to blow it away with a shotgun. After carving what he wanted from the carcass (perhaps with a mouthwatering Sarah Palin mooseburger recipe in mind), he dumped the remainder behind his house, creating  a holy rollin’ doggie pilgrimage site.

I was reminded of this sad event when I experienced my personal WTF moment this afternoon upon learning that Sarah Palin had suddenly resigned her office. After hearing her blathering stream of consciousness explanations, which included everything from fish, to refrigerator magnets, to taking apart the point guard on a basketball team, I was left with the impression that there is more to this rotting corpse than meats meets the nose.

Exhibit One was her statement that she was concerned that “millions of your dollars [are] going down the drain,” including the use of valuable staff time. What else was that but an admission that state taxpayer monies were being spent in connection with her national political ambitions? She seems to think that legitimate ethical investigations (instigated by her own party in their capacity as public officials) are all part of some insidious plot to deny her divinely appointed due.

The rest of her presser was all rationalization and sleight of hand,  including the old political saw of wanting to spend more time with her family. And because it worked so well for so long for the previous Rethuglican president, she tried to play the patriotism card, hoping to transfer the positive feelings Americans have towards the troops to herself.  (What better reason for them to sacrifice life and limb than to protect the right of American citizens everywhere to be the best narcissistic political drama queens that they can be?)

In terms of national politics, the calculation that positioning herself as a selfless maverick would somehow trump her being perceived as a flaky quitter would require a national political adviser with the IQ of a sponge. (Bill Kristol, anyone?)

I suspect, given the recent spate of revelations about her erratic conduct during the ’08 political campaign currently being reported in media outlets like Vanity Fair and Politico, that another shoe is about to drop; and that Palin sees the door to her presidential ambitions being slammed in her face. Even her once sky high approval ratings inside Alaska have dropped significantly.

These are trying economic times for governors all over the country, requiring a skill and sagacity that Sister Sarah may suspect, deep down, she is incapable of.  Hell, she can’t even control her own family, let alone her public image.

In other words, this was an act of desperation.

[Image found here.]


  1. Sherry, wouldn’t it be grrayte is she really was quitting just to spend more time with her family? But the Wasilly sports girl is probably gonna face the music on her multi-million dollar house built by “buddies on the weekend” (Todd the bull-shitter) and the same contractors who built the sports complex in Wasilly. But still. She’ll be out of politics, and that really is “grrayte.”

  2. Propagandee Propagandee

    In AK, the long, virtually lightless winters are followed by what’s called “breakup.” Spring arrives in May-June and the land begins to thaw, slowly at first, then rapidly with a vengeance.

    In the wild, corpses of animals that couldn’t survive the extreme cold emerge, twisted and distorted, sometimes beyond recognition. For people with domestic animals, eight to nine months of winter gives relief from the routine of daily shit removal. But then summer arrives, and the reaper demands his due.

    Sarah, answer the white telephone. please.

  3. i’d rather it be a cell door slamming in her face. i think it’s all about the house, and she was so flustered, because we’re talking about a federal investigation, not an alaskan one. she can’t fire any prosecutors or cow them into doing her will. i think she’s scared shitless.

Prove you're human: leave a comment.