The Tiny Penis Triumvirate

Tiny Penis Sean Tucker DrudgeTucker “Teeny-Weenie” Carlson, Matthew “Mighty Dong” Drudge,
and Sean “Stinger” Hannity with their tiny penis mini-me partners.

 

Before you know it, it’s going to be February again.  And February is Tiny Penis Month, but I bet you knew that.  This year, there’s a three way tie for Tiniest Penis In Media, and of course the media is all engorged over it.  So lock and load, the “winners” are, in order of phallic magnitude:

Matthew Drudge.  In 2006, TIME Magazine named Matthew Drudge one of the 100 most influential people in the world, describing The Drudge Report as “A ludicrous combination of gossip, political intrigue, and extreme weather reports … still put together mostly by the guy who started out as a convenience-store clerk.” Yeah, they forgot “lies,” but.

Sean Hannity.  In 2013, Talkers Magazine listed Sean Hannity as #2 on their “Heavy Hundred” list of the 100 most “important” radio talk show hosts in America.  Inexplicably, the same magazine gave Hannity their “Freedom of Speech” Award in 2003.  And now in 2014, the price of a bucket of warm Elmer Fudd spit has eclipsed the value of their award, as well as any supposed importance of Right Wing Wadio Wackows.

Tucker Carlson.  Oh, and every year, Tucker Carlson is an increasingly tiny dick.  That is all.

 

Insane Repugs We Have Known, UPDATE: The more things change, the more they are exactly the f*cking same

Here in no particular order, are some of our all-time favorite Insane Repugs, depicted in our favorite way:

Ricks v. Fux News (Update)

While I’ve never been a fan of Pulitzer Prize winner Tom Ricks, whom I’ve always considered a deferential Pentagon Village groupie, he deserves mega props for sticking it to Fux News today.

Fux tries to sell itself as a serious news program during the midday hours when it isn’t featuring Rethug propagandists like O’Reilly, Hannity, Van Sustern, and the Fux Force Five. One of its supposed objective news anchors, Jon Scott, was gobsmacked today when Ricks spoke truth to power and called out Fux for being the propaganda arm of the GOP. (Actually, I think it’s the other way around, but we’ll let that go for now.)

HuffPo quotes Ricks:

“I think Benghazi was generally hyped by this network especially,” Ricks said. He added that he thought McCain seemed to be “backing off” from criticizing Rice since “the campaign [was] over.

When you have four people dead for the first time in more than 30 years, how do you call that hype?” Scott said, pushing back against Rice’s [sic] characterization of the network’s coverage.

Ricks compared the situation to security contractors who were killed in Iraq. He described the attack in Benghazi as a “small fire-fight” and added, “I think the emphasis on Benghazi has been extremely political, partly because Fox is operating as the wing of the Republican Party.

Obviously, Scott’s talking points didn’t anticipate Ricks’ bald faced truth, and he terminated the interview after only 90 seconds.

Heh.

UPDATE: 11/28/12   Ricks denies Fux News’ claim that he later apologized for his remarks. Huffpo reports:

On Tuesday, Ricks and Fox News were still feuding. Fox News’ executive VP of news editorial Michael Clemente told the Hollywood Reporter that Ricks “apologized in our offices afterward but doesn’t have the strength of character to do that publicly.”

Ricks denied an apology ever took place. In an email to the Hollywood Reporter, Ricks wrote, “Please ask Mr. Clemente what the words of my supposed apology were. I’d be interested to know. Frankly, I don’t remember any such apology.”

UPDATE: 11:30 a.m. — TVNewser spoke with Clemente, who told the site that he would “refresh [Ricks’] memory” on the apology. After the segment, Clemente said that Ricks told Fox News staffers, “Sorry … I’m tired from a non-stop book tour.” Clemente added, “Perhaps now he can finally get some rest.”

UPDATE: 6:20 p.m. — Ricks emailed Clemente on Tuesday afternoon to clarify that he did not apologize after his interview with Fox News. See a copy of his email below:

Mr. Clemente,

To clarify my comments for you: I did not apologize.

As it happened, I ran into Bret Baier as I emerged from the interview. We know each other from working at the Pentagon. He asked if I was serious in saying that Fox had hyped Bengahzi, and I said I was. We discussed that. It was cordial exchange. (I wouldn’t mention this private conversation except that you apparently are quoting my hallway conversations as part of your attack.)

Later, as I was leaving, the booker or producer (I am not sure what her title was) said she thought I had been rude. I said I might have been a bit snappish because I am tired of book tour. This was in no way an apology but rather an explanation of why I jumped a bit when the anchor began the segment with the assertion that pressure on the White House was building—which it most clearly was not.

Note to Fux News: By all means, keep ignoring the First Rule of Holes.

Mitt Channels Yogi

Jon Stewart asks Willard about his doublethink proposals: Are you a wizard…or a liar?

“I really didn’t say everything I said. […] Then again, I might have said ’em, but you never know.” Yogi Berra

“I’m not familiar precisely with what I said, but I’ll stand by what I said, whatever it was.” –Mitt Romney, to Shawn of the Dead Hannity

 

It became obvious long ago that a fundamental component of the Romney campaign strategy is to spend a billion dollars fusing three of the most effective propaganda techniques ever devised by man: repetition, the Big Lie, and doublethink.

George Orwell in his novel Nineteen Eighty-Four provides some background:

“The key-word here is blackwhite. Like so many Newspeak words, this word has two mutually contradictory meanings. Applied to an opponent, it means the habit of impudently claiming that black is white, in contradiction of the plain facts.”

[…]

Definition of doublethink: “To tell deliberate lies while genuinely believing in them, to forget any fact that has become inconvenient, and then when it becomes necessary again, to draw it back from oblivion for just so long as it is needed….”

Not only has Merry-Go-Round-Now-Moderate-Mitt flip flopped on a plethora of issues, the latest being his position on abortion as he explained it to the Des Moines Register yesterday, but he lies unreMITTingly, not only about the Obama Administration’s record, but his own as well.

As has been said here and elsewhere many times, Willard will say anything to anyone at any time if he thinks it will move him one step closer to the White House. Last week’s debate is a prime example, with Romney telling a series of lies and propagating over two dozen “myths”  some of which  we documented here.

While the establishment media hasn’t been completely absent in noting some of his more egregious lies and flip flops, their record so far has been anemic, reflected in those polls that ask the public about their knowledge of, or more accurately, their level of confusion about specific issues. (The more common “horse race” polls also reflects this ignorance but to a lesser extant, given that they include subjective issues like a candidate’s “likability.”)

The big post-election question for the media is whether the Fourth Estate will live up to its structural responsibility for separating truth from fiction from downright lies. If it doesn’t, we will have completed the transition from the Walter Cronkite era, characterized by a non-profit, non-partisan approach to news and information; to the Rupert Murdoch era, where “news”– more accurately, “infotainment”– is merely the vehicle for propagating a larger corporatist agenda.

We begun and now end with a Yogi-ism that Willard has internalized to perfection, becoming its very embodiment:

When you come to a  fork in the road, take it.

 

Mittens Has No Core

Mittens takes the missionary position…except when he doesn’t As has been demonstrated numerous times by Willard Mitt Romney himself, the man has no core. To repeat what we’ve said here: Consider his ongoing plethora of policy flip-flops, of his penchant for saying whatever a particular audience wants to hear, no matter how much it conflicts with his previous positions to previous audiences. …

Occupy Wall Street v Teabaggers

The Daily Show With Jon Stewart Mon – Thurs 11p / 10c Parks and Demonstration www.thedailyshow.com Daily Show Full Episodes Political Humor & Satire Blog The Daily Show on Facebook Jon Stewart compares the Occupy Wall Street and Teabagger movements As the Occupy Wall Street protest movement spread to cities all over America, including Los Angeles, Boston, Tampa, Chicago, Minneapolis, …

Stewart v. Wallace; Fair v. Unbalanced

Watch the latest video at video.foxnews.com Jon Stewart enters the Fux News snake pit Last Sunday, Jon Stewart was interviewed by Mike Wallace on the Fox News Sunday Show. In the show’s intro (not shown in the clip above), Wallace promised to “grill the bad boy of political comedy about liberal media bias.” You know, that old canard. But it …