Obama Still Not Failing

obamacornsA disgruntled and frustrated Rush Limpbot washed up in the surf to give evil-eyes to President Obama as he photo-opped with Italy’s Prime Minister Silvio Berlusconi,  Russia’s President Dmitry Medvedev,  and President Hu Jintao of China, as they find ways to success at the G20 summit in London, Thursday, while Obamacorns magically erupt out of the sea.

LONDON — With the one day super conference coming to an end with what critics are dubbing “Obamacorns” magically appearing out of the sea, U.S. President Obama said, “I think we did okay. We have agreed on a series of unprecedented steps to restore growth and prevent a crisis like this happening again.  We have created as fundamental a reworking of resources to these international financial institutions as anything we’ve done in the last several decades.”

“Holy Shit,” whistled Italy’s Prime Minister Silvio Berlusconi, “The guy just kicks it into another gear.” German Chancellor Angela Merkel agreed.  “We have a very, very good, almost historic compromise” that will provide the world with “a clear financial markets architecture.  And President Obama is such a gentleman,” she crooned, “he keeps his hands to himself.”

The group announced a global supervisory body to sniff out problems before they turn into full-fledged shit-storms, and pledged 1.1 trillion pieces of agreed upon valuable paper, what twentieth century historians called munnies, to aid countries they previously shat upon with nonchalant regularity.

Oh.  The “Obamacorns“—  the sparkly-white pony-things with single horns that filled the atmosphere at the summit with great expectations— were last seen running into the London row houses followed by a phalanx of press trucks.  And Rush Limpbot?
Who gives a rat’s ass.

(Original Unicorn painting by Jim Warren)


  1. oh crap! obamACORNs? really? that’s enough ammo for limpdick for at least a week! damn radical horses! don’t think that limpy isn’t smart enough to figure out the subterfuge. why, he’ll barely have time to chastise michelle for touching queen liz!

  2. Propagandee

    Happy are the peacemakers, for they shall be called the sons of God. – The Urantia Book

    Sources: Obama Plays Peacemaker in French-Chinese Smackdown Over Tax Havens

    April 02, 2009 11:15 AM

    According to sources inside the room, President Obama just played peacemaker in a spat between French President Nicolas Sarkozy and Hu Jintao, President of the People’s Republic of China.

    In the finaly plenary session among the G-20 leaders, Sarkozy and Hu were having a heated disagreement about tax havens.

    …The exchange between Sarkozy and Hu got so heated, said a source — who is not a member of the Obama administration — it was threatening the unity of the G-20 leaders’ meeting.

    But Mr. Obama, according to this account, stepped between the two men, urging them to try to find consensus, and giving them a “pep talk” about the importance of working together.

    The senior adminstration official said that Mr. Obama pulled Mr. Sarkozy aside, took him to a corner, “and discussed possible alternatives,” the senior official said.


    Once they arrived at one, President Obama “sent a message to the Chinese” that a counter-offer was on the table. The Chinese spent some time considering the offer. But they took a few minutes.

    So Mr. Obama, with the assistance of translators, suggested that he and Mr. Hu have a conversation as well. They, too went to the corner to talk. After a few minutes, Mr. Obama called upon Mr. Sarkozy to join them.

    “Translators and sherpas in tow, they reached an agreement,” the official said. “There was a multiple shaking of hands.”

    “I’d suggest we’d still be in there had he not done this,” the senior Obama administration official said.

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