GOP THANKSGIVING: WE GOT OURS, YOU GET YOURS

Yes. Yes. America. We got ours. Oh yeah, we got the bucks; the houses; the cars; the yachts; all the stuff; we GOT ours. But I’m not talking about the stuff. No.No. I’m talking about ideas. We got ours; we got the ideology. It’s Pure. It’s Conservative. It’s Obstreperous. It’s Precious, America.

Crazy Like A Zero-Tolerance Fox

After a rash of mistakes and apologies over the past weeks, Fox News has sent a memo to employees announcing a new “zero tolerance” policy for on-screen errors. FishBowlDC obtained the memo, sent last Friday, which warns mistakes could lead to written warnings, suspensions and termination. USojo, however, has obtained the rough draft of that memo, which we thought was a lot more insightful and entertaining:

I Need To Know…

Who TF dresses these people every morning? [youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mKKKgua7wQk&feature=player_embedded[/youtube] How do they manage to remember their way back home? Bread crumbs? There’s a huge difference between good, sound reasons, and reasons that merely sound good. — Burton Hillis

Apocalyptic Clusterphuquers

Apocalyptic blowhards Jerry Jenkins and Timmeh LaHaye, co-authors of the hysterically ironic “Left Behind” series, join Sarah Palin’s fave buttboy, Sean Hannity in the latest conservatard craze, “Palin’ It.”

Please Lord, Kill Obama For Us.

Does anyone in this country know where the line is between free speech and incitement to murder? If you missed Frank Schaeffer on Rachel Maddow Tuesday night, watch the video. Do we just let all the religious maniacs Schaeffer is talking about work themselves into a self-righteous frenzy until one or more of them decide they’ll do the Lord’s dirty …

Conservatives Said To Be Changing Pledge of Allegiance?

One divisible nation under God? WASHINGTON — D.C.  The Bachmann Turned-on Overdrive Tea Party turned ugly today when the Liberal Press got hold of Missouri Republican Rep. Todd Akin‘s apparent attempt to change the nation’s only agreed upon pledge of allegiance.  Americans claiming to be true Patriots said they recognized immediately that Rep. Akin dropped the word “indivisible” from the …

Milkin’ It

I don’t do much cow dairy, so imagine my shock at seeing this vicious attack on four of our nation’s most profligate smug lying bastards.