ethics Archives - Page 5 of 52 - WORLD OF THE CROSS

GOLF IS JUST FOR RICH DOUCHEBAGS LIKE ME.

Lemme tell yooz something okay— you see those Mexican guys behind me, the non-rapist, non-criminal type Mexicans, playin’ there in my tremendous yard? I have assured the non-rapist and noncriminal Mexicans, the good ones, I assume, that I love them and their country, and their smart leaders who are smarter than our leaders!
Look, I am tremendously wealthy, treee-mennn-dously wealthy— and trust me, I can afford to love everyone of them if I wanted to, but let me say this: instead, they are sending us their criminals, their rapists, their murderers, their tacos, their tortillas, and you know, many many other types of their food I don’t care to pronounce. There could be anywhere from 11 million to 34 million, nobody knows; nobody knows. And you know I’m right, they know I’m right, everybody knows I’m right, including the LGPA, the PGA, the USGA, the LMOP, the QRST, everybody!

“In response to Mr. Trump’s comments about the golf industry ‘knowing he is right’ in regards to his recent statements about Mexican immigrants, we feel compelled to clarify that those remarks do not reflect the views of our organizations. While the LPGA, PGA of America, PGA Tour and USGA don’t usually comment on Presidential politics, Mr. Trump’s comments are inconsistent with our strong commitment to an inclusive and welcoming environment in the game of golf, to anyone who can afford it.” —LPGA

Meet The New Clowns, Same As The Old Clowns

A Garrulous Guide To The 2016 Republican Presidential Trainwreck

SECULAR TOTALITARIANISM! Now With Even More Sucky-ness.

Secularism frees us from ecclesiastical slavery— only to betray us into the tyranny of political and economic slavery.

On Planet Urantia. Still.

DAY 24,505 On This Planet.

I feel like WE are Groot, today. I don’t feel like spelling it out more than that. I may get a double-take, or an “Excuse me??” stare, but that’s become a lot more frequent a response to me this decade, anyway.

So.

“WE are Groot.”

∞

Oversight Pissing Contest

Just remember pussycats, “simulated drowning” is not torture.

Trouble In McDonaldland

The flagship burger of McDonaldland is the Big Mac, shown above with a list of its ingredients supplied by McDonalds. McDONALDLAND — Refusing to answer questions about Mayor McCheese‘s crack cocaine use, McLisa McComb, a spokeswoman for McDonald’s USA, announced the demise of the online presence of the McResource program, following the solicited appearance on their McWebsite of “unnecessary McViews …

TED CRUZ TALKS TO GRILLED SAUSAGE

Senator Ted Cruz walked out of the Mens Congressional restroom Friday, talking to a levitating ballpark frank.

Ted Cruz Chats With His Lunch in the Congressional Men’s Room

WASHINGTON— A partially dressed and apparently deranged Senator Ted Cruz (®Texas), emerged from the Congressional Men’s room Friday, alternately sobbing and talking coherently with an apparently invisible sausage or hot dog, which he claimed was hovering just above his head in front of him.

The Senator, who was shirtless and covered with dark paw marks of some sort was met outside the restroom by a phalanx of Capital Hill reporters with recording devices and a few snickers.

When asked why he was sobbing, Cruz responded, “Look! Just look what they did to my sweet little dog, Teddy; Obamacare grilled my sweet little dog. Well, why doesn’t he try and say it to my dog’s face!”

“Um, where is your dog Teddy now, sir?” asked Fox News reporter, Ed Henry. “There— right there in the lights, just in front of me” replied Cruz, staring off to the ceiling. The senator then made a series of little stroking motions, as if he were petting a dog; an uncomfortable silence was broken by the arrival of Capital Hill Security, who gingerly escorted the Senator from the room.

Cruz, who Majority Leader Harry Reid (D-Nev.) recently said was “…a laughing stock to everybody but him,” led the costly Tea Party debacle which shut down the United States Government for sixteen days; current estimates say the shutdown cost 900,000 jobs. Conservative pundicks say this is exactly the kind of thing that will endear him to the angry dead-ender conservative base, who are determined to vote against their own best interest, even if it means voting for a douche who talks to hotdogs while laying cable.